


The Hell Raisers - Star Vs the Forces of Evil X Helluva Boss AU

by RK64



Category: Helluva Boss (Web Series), Star vs. The Forces Of Evil
Genre: Action/Adventure, Blood and Violence, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-18 11:15:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29242683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RK64/pseuds/RK64
Summary: Killing is a pastime for many in Hell and some even can get money from it. A pathetic Imp figures, why not get some idiots to help him get jobs done faster? A flaming skeleton and succubus ex-girlfriend help the Imp form the Hell Raisers, a new hit-squad in the third ring of Hell. Follow Star, Marco, Tom and Janna as they get into bloody fun, learn about each other and discover new things about themselves.Loosely inspired by the 'Helluva Boss' web-series, this violent comedy in Hell features strong language, implied sexual themes and more, so stay away if you aren't ready for some dark comedy.
Relationships: Star Butterfly/Marco Diaz, Tom Lucitor/Janna Ordonia
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	1. Welcome to Hell

The soft red hexagon in the sky shined down in the small demon town, creatures of all kinds roaming about. The usual screams echoed through the streets, but Marco enjoyed the mid-morning regardless. Feeling a chill, he fixed on his leather jacket as his bony body leaned against the window frame. 

Soft embers escaped his head, the gentle yellow flame faintly lighting up the darkness around him. Yellow eye sockets focused on the sky, feeling the blood-red sky call to him. 

“You still up, sweetie?” He didn’t even turn around, feeling his partner's soft breasts against his back. “Couldn’t sleep?”

He only gave a soft chuckle. “I can’t sleep, my angel.” He turned around and gave the succubus a kiss. “You know, the whole ‘no organs’ thing.” She rolled her playful blue eyes, holding Marco’s arm as she watched the blood-red sky herself. “Anything on your mind, Star?”

“Nah, just wondering what that asshole wants from us,” She sighed, blue eyes narrowing. “Kicked that piece of shit outta my life, not too _thrilled_ to work for him again.”

Marco put a hand on Star’s shoulder, gently brushing her long blonde locks. “Hey, I’m not happy my friend treated _my_ girl horribly but he’s my friend. Let’s just hear Tom out.” Star frowned, with Marco grinning. “ _Then_ you can castrate him.” 

“You know me so well, sweetie.” Star lashed her heart-shaped tail playfully, her heart-marked tattoos on her elbows glowing faintly. “In that case, I’ll freshen up while you enjoy hell-gazing.”

She kissed his cheek, leaving a burning mark on his cheekbone. Marco smiled as he watched Star go into the bathroom. He looked around their small apartment, the past two years playing in his mind on replay. 

Pictures plastered of places they’ve explored together, from the burning sands on the second circle to the icy mountain climb in the fourth circle. His eyes drifted to the sole human head they have hanging on the wall, Marco folding his arms upon looking at it. It was of a boring looking Imp man. But Marco knew who it was, proud of his partner for settling a score. 

His eyes then landed on two weapons hanging on the wall in a heart-shaped plak. A beautiful blade made of ethereal red metal forged in the deepest pits in the seventh circle and a proud pink and purple axe with a rainbow handle. 

Marco brushed his bony fingers against both weapons, feeling such _power_ emanating from each tool. He took both blades off the walls, walking toward the large queen-sized bed they had. Sitting down on the pink fabrics, he grabbed a nearby rag and gently polished his blade. 

_Get the feeling we’ll need these today._ Marco sighed, wondering what the hell Tom wanted. Bad enough things were a bit strained between them in recent years, but finding out that he was _the_ shitstain Star bitched about when bringing up exes? Marco shook his head. _Hear him out. That’s it._

Once his blade was shining like a newborn star, he put it in his special leather scabbard. Moving on to Star’s axe, he smiled at a fun memory she told him. _She’s so breathtaking when she’s going at it…_ He was told succubi aren’t known for resorting to violence, preferring using their sexual hormones to get the job done. 

...Star getting her hands dirty got Marco’s flame burning a bright pink. 

“You still aren’t ready?” Marco looked up, seeing Star dressed. His flame only grew higher, unable to look away. Donning her usual short blue-dress, she fixed long white-gloves that had heart and spades at her palms. She folded her arms, having a toothy smirk with her bright pink lips. Her shoulder heart tattoos, one having ‘S&M’ and another having ‘MD’ proudly in the center, glowed a faint pink. And her bright blue eyes shone with small hearts in her pupils. 

“I can’t get over how I make you swoon over me, my bony dork,” She kissed his forehead. Marco patted his cheeks, having a toothy grin of his own. “I wouldn’t mind another round…”

Marco felt so _tempted_ but he sighed. “Maybe after we get the thing with ‘shit stain’ over with, okay babe?” Star rolled her eyes but her smile remained. She grabbed the axe off the bed and carelessly tossed it between her hands, her heeled white boots clanking against the wooden floor. 

She threw it in the air, snapping her fingers and the weapon magically shrinking into a small little pink dagger. “Good call honey, we might need some help in killing him.”

“We don’t need our weapons for _that_ ,” Marco walked toward the closet, throwing on his leather blue-jeans and sneakers. “Fought with the guy a few times, couldn’t hurt a fly.”

Star just giggled, seeing Marco struggling to fit on a white shirt. She just walked up to him, ripping it off and tossing it in the trash. He pouted. “You look sexy shirtless, don’t worry about looking modest for _my_ sake.” 

“Don’t like the wind flowing through my rib cage though…” Marco complained, fixing on his jacket. He tried buttoning it, but it just wouldn’t do. He was going to complain about his bulky frame but Star ogling his ribs made him smile. “Maybe you’ll keep me warm on the ride there…” 

She traced hearts on his shoulders, giggling yet again. “Sure thing,” She winked and left the apartment first. Marco fixed the scabbard on his belt and grabbed a steak from the fridge. _Gotta feed my girl._

Walking down the flight of stairs, he caught the jealous glares from his neighbors. Marco simply shrugged his shoulders, knowing once they caught the scabbard on his belt, they’ll shut up. 

Opening the door to the parking lot, he looked around for Star, spotting her pink figure nuzzling against Nacho’s face. Marco walked toward two, kneeling down and scratching his baby’s neck. “Hey girl, ready for a ride?” 

The dragon cycle snorted a small flame from her nostrils. Star caught the steak in Marco’s fingerless-gloved hands. “Marc, you really need to stop spoiling our girl. She’s getting a _wee_ bit overweight.” 

“Nonsense, she needs it to get going. Isn’t that right, Nacho’s?” He pet her scaly skin, feeling her purr in content. He gave her the steak and she happily devoured it whole. Making a loud burp, it erupted into a small streak of fire. The fire hit another car, melting someone’s tires. 

Star and Marco looked at each other, having ‘oh shit’ looks on their faces. Saying nothing, the couple hopped on Nachos and drove off before the car alarm started blaring. Marco could swear he heard the neighbor cursing ‘that damn mut burned my tires again!’ and held in his laughter. 

They drove through the busy streets, relishing the lukewarm air gusting against them. Marco’s yellow eyes focused on the road ahead, but he could feel his partners warm body pressing against his back. Her thick arms held on tight against Marco’s chest, gloved fingers almost ticking his exposed chest. 

With Star’s chin resting on Marco’s shoulder, they both felt at peace riding through the third ring of Hell. The vibrations of Nachos mixed with the warmth from Star’s touch, gave Marco a feeling of living. _Thought I would never get this after dying but…_ Part of him wanted to thank Satan for blessing him with Star, though he wondered if he should thank God for that… 

Shaking the boring thought off, he just focused on one thing. _What does Tom want?_ Marco felt his mind wander at the many possibilities, though the weight of his sword gave him an idea of exactly what his friend wanted. 

* * *

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. 

A lone demonic Imp, his somewhat tall stature slumped over at his desk, drumming his clawed fingers against the worn out oak that made up his desk. The damn thing was held up by three pegs and a stool, as he was too cheap to get someone to fix it. 

Dark red eyes drifted toward the TV playing, having some news post on a spring break gone wrong. A monster fish of some kind attacked assholes on Earth. The Imp smirked a toothy grin, enjoying seeing the blood-soaked scene. 

_Maybe if those assholes show up soon, we could get in on the action._ He looked around the boring office, a thin line on his face. It wasn’t _much_ but the Imp got what he could to make it presentable. A chalkboard for drawing out plans, with some drawings of a crude Imp in the center with two succubus' throwing their arms around him. 

Filling out the room was a small table with a few chairs for meetings, the TV faintly going in-and-out from it’s shitty reception and a barely working heater that actually made it _colder_ somehow. 

The ringer on his desk came alive, with the Imp picking up the phone instantly. “Thomas Lucitor here, we kill for the right price. If you don’t pay up, fuck off.”

“Hey asshole, it’s your ‘buddy’ Marco,” Tom smirked, playing with the phone’s cord. “Star and I will be heading over soon but traffic is a bit crazy today. What _do_ you even want anyway?” 

“That’s a surprise, Mr. Diaz,” Tom stood up, looking out his single window. “It involves a lot of blood though, if you want a…”

“Shut the fuck up, you limp-dick shit stain.” Tom winced, feeling his heart sink hearing Star’s voice. “We are only coming because we need the cash. You better have the green when we get there.” 

“Come on Starship, I know you missed my _charms_ ,” He winked but a low growl came from the other end. 

“Hey, ‘Mr. Diaz’ is on the call now and don’t flirt with my fiancee again, **_got it_ **?” Tom sighed, signaling Marco to continue. “But she’s got a point, we do need the money.”

“Alright, take it easy asshole.” The call cut out and Tom folded his arms. “Yesh, I figured friends _want_ to help you.” His eyes looked toward a strange portal on the wall, it glowing a bright red. “I’d bet Butterfly will sing a different song once she sees _that_.” 

* * *

_Why am I even doing this?_ Star pondered, watching her fiance park their baby in the cramped parking lot. She folded her arms, studying the building. _I’m willing to bet he sucked a lot of dicks to get the money for that._ She smirked. _Hope the bitch hated every second of it._

“Nachos seems irritated,” Marco spoke up, getting Star’s attention. “Though gave her permission to eat anyone who bothers her.” Marco’s flame turned blue. “I know that look.”

Star flicked her hair back. “What look?” Marco’s flame shifted a faint red. 

“Eyelashes looking like daggers. Your hearts glowing a bright red. Your pupils have skulls. Should I go on?” Star took out a pocket mirror, blinking at how evil she looked. “I mean… I find that sexy but we aren’t in bed love.” 

She sighed and took a few deep breaths. “Sorry, just… Fuck!” She lashed her heart-shaped tail like a whip. “Piece of shit has nerves bothering me again…” Marco pulled Star into a hug. She started purring from his touch. “You won’t hold me back, right?”

“Promise,” Marco ensured her, brushing a strand of her blonde hair aside. They held each other’s hand as they entered the building, with Star frowning at the bastard’s red eyes glowing from a nearby window. 

A strange sense of fear came over her, as they walked up the flight of stairs. _Wish I could use my wings to fly…_ But the soothing touch from Marco’s grasp calmed her down. 

_Come on hot stuff, you’ll love my plan…_ Star’s mind froze, a memory bubbling… 

“Star?” Marco’s voice felt distant. 

_I mean, you got a deal with the big man, make sure I get my cut, you hear toots?_

“You’re burning up, Star!” 

_Love? Meh, dumb emotion. Didn’t think a succubitch could feel that._

“Hey!” Star felt something heavy hold her tight, blinking way tears. “I’m here, babe.” Star hugged Marco back, letting out a shaky breath. “You seriously are burning up though, glad our clothes are fire proof.” 

She wiped the burning tears away, the two standing before a door. Star’s fingernails felt like claws, ready to rip the fucking thing out of her way. Marco gently opened the door instead, taking the first steps inside. 

“Tom? You’re here?” Marco asked aloud, but Star could only wince at the smell. _It smells like hookers and failure. Gross._ The desk chair swivels around, with Tom trying to look mysterious… If the chair didn’t stop spinning. 

“Hello… Wait a sec,” Tom tried stopping the chair but it continued spinning. “This piece of shit… I said stop!” He jabbed his claws into the desk but his face slapped it. “Ugh…” Star folded her arms, an ugly laugh erupting from her lips. “Not that funny, Starship…”

“Still the pathetic mongrel I remember, bitch.” She started, not letting Marco talk. “If we do anything for a loser like you, I want compensation first.” She slammed her hands into the desk, jolting Tom up. “I fucking _dare_ you to screw me over again.” 

“That was the best thing that ever happened to you. Your kind loves going at it.” Star felt her hair stand upright, nearly erupting into violent yellow flames. “Oh here it comes, the whole ‘you ruined my life’ speech.” Tom stood up and was inches away from her face. “You still want me and you are just afraid to admit it!” 

“Like Hell asshole!” Star’s entire body went aflame and she was ready to rip the fucking desk off the floor. _If he wants to die now, I have no issue ripping his fucking skull off!_

A loud slam got Star’s attention, turning to a livid Marco. Star recoiled seeing Marco lift Tom up with one hand. Marco’s eyes glowed a soulless white. He pinned Tom to the chalkboard, gasping for air. “ **Are you finished?** ” Tom dumbly nodded, with Marco dropping him like a sack of potatoes, eyes reverting to their usual yellow. “Good. What do you want from us?”

“Satans Ass… When the hell did you get so strong?” Tom wezed. “Our job is for us to kill a target…” Star and Marco watched as Tom walked toward a curtain. “...On Earth.” 

Star and Marco’s eyes went wide. She walked toward the portal, seeing a faint image of an odd town in the center of it. “Portals too… Earth?” She put her hand through the portal and quickly pulled it out, seeing her hand was still intact. “How…” 

“You finally used that demonic magic you blabbered on about?” Marco asked, making Star raise an eyebrow. “During an adventure we went on a few years back, Tom was able to cast insane Hellfire.” Marco folded his arms, his flame turning a faint green. “Didn’t know that magic could make portals to Earth. Thought you needed incantations or special tomes for that?” 

“We would be one of the only Hit Squads in Hell that can easily go to the surface and cause mayhem.” Tom smirked, wagging his finger and walking toward the chalkboard. He started drawing crude versions of Star and Marco. “You two are good killers, though I’m a good shot myself. So, I figure I call you assholes to help me cap some heads and make some dough.” He bowed, wagging his hands. “Sounds like a great deal, huh?”

Marco sat down on the chair, his flame turning a dark blue. “I am good at assassination work, but… I don’t want to kill innocents.” 

Star leaned on the wall, mind lost in thought. _Seeing… Earth._ Part of her felt odd memories being on the surface, though her Death Day was so long ago, she forgot what grass or the ocean looked like. _I… I want to see that blue sky again._ She looked right at Marco, his flame shifting colors rapidly. 

Then, she looked at Tom, seeing his shit eating grin grow like the cancer it was. _Tommy boy thinks he got us hooked, line and sinker..._ She smirked right back, walking toward him. “I know how this shit works, so I’m going to cut the deal here.” 

“Wait a minute Starship, I established Thomas’s Killing Time and…” Star shook her head and took out her pink dagger, stabbing it into Tom’s palm. He screamed as she twisted the knife into the desk. 

“No sweetie, I’m the bad bitch in charge of this operation. You are just the one dealing the money, okay?” Tom growled in frustration. “See, that name sucks. Worse than you blowing anyone. So I’m calling us, ‘The Hellraisers’. Secondly…” She yanked the dagger, Tom holding his hand as it was bleeding out. 

She walked toward the chalkboard and wiped out the entire thing. “We pick targets that _deserve_ to land in this shithole.” Star didn’t have to look at Marco to know he was happy, hearing a sigh of relief. “We have an interview process with clients and if two out of the three of us agree, we strike.” 

She turned around, tapping the piece of chalk in her palm. “Lastly, we need to see if limpdick over there can keep those portals open. Last thing we need is to be stuck on Earth.” Star shivered. “Dealt with Big Red. He’s not someone we want pissed at us.” 

“Agreed.” Marco and Tom said in unison, though Tom’s voice was more strained. He wrapped his hand with a bandage in one of his desk draws. 

“But _I’m_ the one in charge here, got it assholes?” Tom asserted his pathetic dominance. With Marco rubbing his neck and Star narrowing her eyes. “...You can lead operations Starship.”

“And Marco and I get the biggest cut from the client.” Star put the chalk away, not even seeing Tom squint his eyes. “Now that we all agree…” She tuned out Tom shouting ‘no way bitch’. “Let’s see where this portal leads.” 

She closed her eyes and jumped through first, knowing Marco and the dickbag weren’t far behind. 


	2. Earthly Ventures

Stumbling out of the portal, Tom rubbed his hand and mumbled curses toward that  _ damned  _ bitch.  _ How dare she stab my hand! What did I even say?  _ He tucked it into his dress pants, wincing at the pain. But his red eyes narrowed as he looked around him. 

Bright blue painted the sky, with warm fluffy clouds sploshing the clear view. And Earth’s strange sun shined down, looking like a pussy version of the fabled Blood Moon.  _ Hey, at least it’s nice and toasty out.  _ The warm summer-like weather felt great on Tom’s pale-red skin. 

He looked toward Star and Marco, the two looking around as if they’ve never seen Earth before. Tom scoffed, fixing his long tail around him like a belt.  _ Shit’s nothing special.  _ So many stories of men and women he slept with talking about how great the mud rock was...

“Don’t worry ‘children’, you can fuck in an ocean once we get our contract done with,” Tom waved his hand casually, causing Star to sharply turn around and glare at him. “And  _ stop  _ with the high and mighty shit,  _ I’m  _ the reason we’re even here so fucking respect me.” 

Star’s glare narrowed, tapping Tom’s shoulder and pointing toward where they just came out. Tom turned around, folding his arms and rolling his eyes. 

“The portal was there, right?” Marco spoke up, walking toward the spot and seeing nothing. 

“It’ll show up again, it’s just how my magic works guys,” Tom smirked. “You doubt my skills?” 

Star took a heavy sigh and faint embers escaped her locks. She started talking about how ‘then why is the damn thing gone’ or something, tuning her out as he walked on ahead.  _ Fuck it, I’ll do it myself then.  _

Just as he took a few steps, he tripped over Star’s long tail. “Listen to me you insect!” Tom frowned, laying on the ground and having a bored look. “If you can’t portal us back to Hell, Satan  _ will  _ notice. And I do not  _ want  _ to fuck him again.” 

Tom glared, with Marco’s eye sockets faintly glowing white looking upon him. “Told you guys, I’ll make one when I feel like it,” Tom got on his feet, dusting off his pants and turning around. “Now, our target is at some dump called Echo Creek Academy. Get your asses moving.” 

He walked on ahead, doing his best not to face Star or Marco. _They don’t have to find out about that._ So who cares if he just discovered a portal in his office? Not like more can’t pop up around Earth… 

...At least, Tom hoped so, pushing the legitimate fear of Satan feeding him to the mighty Cerberus far back in his mind. Instead, he just looked around at the panicked humans who saw three demonic creatures walking in broad daylight. 

Tom stopped walking, red eyes going wide.  _ Damn it! Forgot disguises, left the fucking things back in the office.  _ He turned around, seeing Star’s beautiful pout and Marco’s concerned frown. “Guys, let’s just, um… Go behind that bush for a sec. Kay? Kay.” He casually walked toward a bush and rolled into it. 

He peeked his head out from it, his stubby horns having some leaves stuck to them. He looked around, seeing the two assholes in an alleyway.  _ Oh, that’s better.  _ He rolled out of the bush and leaned on the wall next to Marco.

“You are  _ so  _ lucky my kind can do this…” Star sighed as she held out her arms. Pink and purple magic swelled around her, with the magic revealing a busty human woman with tanned skin and slightly more modest clothing, replacing her usual dress with a crop top and ripped blue jeans. She fixed her hair, rolling up her gloves and looking at herself in the pocket mirror. “Stop looking at my breasts and use your disguise.” 

“Come on, you know Imps can’t do…” He tried to argue but he turned to Marco, who simply took out different gloves, covering his bony hands completely and his unzipping something on his jacket. Taking out a small hood from the back, he threw it over his face completely covering it. The only thing he could see from Marco’s face was a faint glow of his yellow eyes. 

Tom sighed and did what he could. Taking out a comb from his pocket, he brushed his hair to be more spikey, completely covering his stubby horns and fixed his make-shift tail belt so no one could notice the tails end. Taking a deep breath, he retracted his claws somewhat to look like overgrown fingernails. 

“Huh… You pass off as a human way too easily.” Marco stated, with Tom folding his arms. 

“Blame a shitty gene pool, Diaz.” Tom countered, looking at his companions for a moment. “You know… Starship and you pass off as a human couple well.” Tom grinned. “I think mail-order brides are a thing on Earth still, Daiz.” 

Marco growled, his yellow eyes glowing. “Just be grateful Star and I can adapt to stuff like this,” He turned toward Star, a faint pink ember glowing beneath his hood. “You still look beautiful, love.” 

“Love how mysterious  _ you _ look, babe.” Star kissed Marco’s cheek. Tom groaned, huffing in annoyance. “We could fuck in your office, if you rather that dickhead.” 

“No thank you, would rather drink goat piss.” Tom spat, taking out a sheet of paper and tracing his finger on it. “So our target is some prick named Skeeves. What a shitty name.” 

Star took the paper out of Tom’s hands, blue eyes reading it carefully. “Wait, this guy is a...” She looked up at Tom, having a curious look. “Thought you would not care about targets.” 

He yanked the paper from her hands, tapping it against his palm. “I could care less if we kill a woman with two leaches inside her or some orange abomination, money is money.” He leaned against the wall, his red eyes lighting up the darkness around them. “The client was some junkie and he kept spouting about ‘this guy ruined my life’ and whatnot.”

“So  _ why  _ was he a junkie?” Marco asked. “People don’t always do drugs for the hell of it, they get pushed down that path. Or nudged…” He paused, voice growing small for a moment. 

“I didn’t pay attention, as the guy couldn’t even speak clearly. Like come on!” He waved his hands around. “Just because we are shitstains doesn’t mean you can’t talk clearly. Respect I tell ya…” 

“Ha, funny.” Star countered. 

“Ignoring that…” Tom coughed, looking at the paper. “So we kill this asshole and we find a way back home.” He tucked the paper in his pocket, clasping his hands together. “Any suggestions on how to kill him?”

Star and Marco looked at each other, having blank looks. 

“You gotta be…” Tom knew these two were killers.  _ I’ve seen the skeleton bastard murder fucking armies for the frost bitch in that damn fourth circle and the less said about Starship the better.  _

“So, quiet or loud?” Marco asked, with Tom grinning at him. “Can’t be loud, since we don’t want a crowd.” 

“I like loud…” Star frowned, with Marco throwing an arm around her shoulder. “Screams of the weak turn me on.”

“I-I know, love but we aren’t home. But how about…” He whispered in her ear. Tom studied their expressions, seeing Stars heart tattoos glow and her pink lips forming an evil grin. “Mmm?”

“Ooohh, that’s brilliant,” She looked at Tom, rubbing her chin devilishly. “But we need someone to be the  _ baby _ .” 

“What?” Tom raised an eyebrow, with Marco giving him a ‘sorry man’ look. 

* * *

“You think this fits the ‘single mother’ look, darling? Want to look pathetic for the human,” Star asked Marco, holding up a simple yellow dress. It had yellow flowers on the chest area, the waist era had a single monarch butterfly and it matched nicely with the yellow boots she picked out. 

Marco rubbed his bony chin, looking around the clothing shop they were at. But Marco simply smiled, watching Star look at him expectantly. He couldn’t help but fantasize about his dark starlight wearing half the clothing in this place. Star noticed, tapping his shoulder and giving him a playful smile. 

“I’ll let you pick something  _ fun  _ out for later if you help me, okay dork?” Marco sheepishly nodded, looking over his partner. 

“I think you look great, the dress fits you well and…” He tapped his chin for a moment. “It  _ does  _ scream ‘suburban mom’ that we saw on the TV.” Marco couldn’t shake the memory of Star laughing her ass off at the sitcom during their couple Thursday. 

Star rushed into the dressing room, changing back to her grey crop top and torn jeans. She carelessly tossed the dress and yellow boots in Tom’s arms, the Imp nearly falling on his back. “You better pick something cool for me,  _ Mom _ .” 

“You’ve been a naughty boy, so I’ll pick out something  _ lovely  _ for you, Timmy.” Star gave her ‘son’ an evil grin. Marco held in laughter, seeing Tom seething in rage. “Maybe your god parents will grant you a wish.” She walked off, looking for clothes for her little ‘Timmy’. 

Marco took the clothes from Tom, carefully folding them. “It’s nice being on Earth,” He started, getting Tom’s attention, though his scowl remained. “You may hate it but I remember… Liking it here?” 

“All ‘Fallen’ love their time on this rock. It’s boring and I imagine Hell can top anything this shit rock offers.” Tom rolled his eyes, looking at the other shoppers. They were completely oblivious of demons and monsters walking amongst them. “How are you pulling your disguise off so well?”

Marco shrugged, walking toward the ‘little boys’ section and looking through rock shirts. He threw the dress over his broad shoulders as he looked through the racks. “I guess… Control my emotions? You know how my flame can get.” 

Tom smirked, sitting on a stool nearby. “Yeah, surprised that flame isn’t always pink, since you always blush around Starship,” Marco peaked through the clothes, narrowing his eyes. “Don’t blame you man, she’s a bombshell.”

“...One you fucked over,” Marco resumed looking through the clothes, before snapping his fingers. “Found it.” He took the shirt off the rack, throwing it toward Tom. He caught it and his red eyes went wide. “Remember you mentioned on a mission a while back that you liked that metal band. So why not blend in wearing that?” 

A faceless skeleton with black skin stood proudly in the center, tearing through belts and chains. “Nice…” Tom looked toward Marco, giving him a genuine grin. “Hopefully this matches the pussy outfit Starship picks out.” 

“You could also just wear it in Hell, man,” Marco shrugged his shoulders, seeing Star run their way. She was hopping in place, having a playful smile on her face. “Hey babe, you found the rest of your ‘childs’ uniform? Picked out a shirt for him.” 

Star simply held a cluster of dresses. The only boy’s clothing in the pile was a pair of underwear. 

Marco raised a finger. 

“I’m NOT wearing a fucking dress! I’m a grown…” The shoppers looked in their direction. “...I’m a growing young man,  _ Mother _ .”

“But sweetie, you came out the other day,” Star knelt down and pinched Tom’s cheek. “I think you’ll look  _ great  _ in purple.” 

Marco dropped his finger, sighing and walking away from the incoming explosion. He grabbed a pair of dress pants and walked up to the register. “Hello, what can I do for you today?” The kind woman clerk asked, with Marco gently placing the shirt and pants on the counter. “Got a good eye for fashion I see… That will be thirty dollars.” 

_ Thankful Hell money works on Earth…  _ He took the money out of his wallet and grabbed the bagged clothing. 

“Stop it,  _ Mom! _ ” Tom shouted, rushing out of the dressing room wearing a purple dress and pink heels. “If you put that damn eyelash on me, I will  _ burn this damn  _ place to the ground!” 

“You will look so cute though!” Star said with an evil smile. Marco just started laughing, shaking his head. 

“Trouble child, huh?” The clerk asked. 

“You could say that,” Marco took out a hundred from his wallet. “I’ll get them before they actually burn the place down.” 

Marco walked up to Star and Tom, and carelessly lugged them over his shoulders.

* * *

“You can put me down, Diaz.” 

Marco shook his head, with Star saying nothing. She was apparently enjoying the ‘ride’ to Echo Creek Academy. 

_ Keep your kinky shit out of work, damn it.  _ Tom sighed, looking at the bag Marco was holding. “Thanks, for actually getting a good look for me. Can’t believe Starship wanted to make me look like a pussy.”

“You are one though,” She spat out casually. “And sweetie, you can put me down now. We are getting strange looks now.” Marco looked around, seeing students giving funny looks outside the school entrance. 

He put both her and Tom down, having a sheepish smile. “So we follow the plan, you two get changed.” Marco passed the bags of clothing. Star gave Marco a knowing grin. “Don’t… Kill Tom before we finish the job, okay?

“No promises,” She winked, causing Tom to roll his eyes. “Come on, ‘Timmy’, time to get you enrolled.” Tom followed Star as Marco casually hung around. After a minute or so, he couldn’t see Marco anymore, being alone with Star for the first time in years. 

He didn’t have to look up to see her smile completely vanish, a thin line across her dark red lips.  _ Come on Starship, I’m not that horrible.  _ Tom tucked hands into his pants, the two now in darkness away from the students and teachers. Star gave him a pointed glare.  _ Take the hint, bitch.  _

Taking the clothes Marco picked out for him, Tom effortlessly put them on and found them surprisingly snug. Tucking his tail through the belt-straps, he turned toward Star. 

He sighed, seeing her fix that sea of blonde hair. The yellow flower dress fit her perfectly, highlighting  _ everything  _ effortlessly. Even her yellow boots looked stunning on her.  _ You’re so lucky Diaz…  _

Star apparently noticed Tom’s gawking, having a hostile grin. “It’s frowned upon for son’s to be turned on by their mother. You are a very disgusting little Imp, Timmy.” 

Tom blinked, feeling insulted. “...Let’s just get this over with.” The two were silent as they walked through the school halls, earning gasps and curious glances. Though Tom noticed they were all on Star specifically.  _ Her succubitch hormones at work. Yesh.  _

They eventually found the principal's office and knocked on the door. Star fixed her dress and clasped her hands together, having a plastic smile on her lips. The door opened, revealing a short man. He had a blue suit on, with a stupid little red tie. His squire-shaped glasses fogged up, simply looking at Star. 

_ Bet the pig is sweating right now.  _ Tom grinned.  _ Wonder how much blood will leak when popped?  _ “Oh my… Didn’t know I had a guest. Please, come in.” Star walked inside, sitting down on the wooden chair. Tom joined her, but his nose winced at the smell. 

And his highlighted demonic senses didn’t help him ignore the…  _ stains  _ across the carpet. “Thank you for talking to me and my little Timmy on such notice…” Tom raised an eyebrow at Star’s southern accent. “He’s such a slow little boy,” He leaned forward, intentionally puffing up her chest toward the principal. “He set the school pet on fire. What a problem child…”

“W-Well,” he took off his glasses, wiping the fog off them once more. “Our Academy is very prestigious, taking in only those with the highest of grades.” He collapsed his hands together, having a focused glare. “I’m afraid that your son would have many challenges here, Miss…”

“Stella. Stella Diablo.” She started crying, actual tears coming down her eyes. “Oh my… Just thinking of my dear husband sparks the water works…” Tom propped his head with his hands. 

“Mom, dad’s been  _ dead  _ for years. You gotta move on already,” Tom played along with the act, but he was surprised at the hostile glare Star shot him. 

“Timmy, I told you to not  _ speak  _ when the grown-ups are talking.” Tom took in a deep breath and stood up. “Timmy?” 

“You talk with Skeeves about getting me in here. Gonna look around.” He turned around, giving Star a knowing look. “Take your time.” He closed the door and went outside. 

He didn’t want to see Star’s bloodbath after all.

* * *

Marco took out his Hell Phone, wondering why they were taking so long.  _ It’s been a half hour already…  _ He tucked it away and looked up at the blue skies. “I wonder if Star wouldn’t mind having a joyride before we go home?” 

“Sup.” Marco didn’t turn around, feeling someone sit next to him. “Cutting class too? Or ditching?” 

“Nah, just waiting for my friend’s to take care of something,” Marco answered, turning toward the bench-buddy. She had long black hair, wearing an orange beane and having brown eyes. 

“I would imagine demons having fun on Earth,” She said casually, causing Marco’s flame to glow a faint orange beneath his hoodie. “So, what demon are you? A skeleton or gargoyle?”

“I’m a human. Demons aren’t real.” Marco laughed nervously, but the girl’s smirk pinned him in place. 

Silence lingered between them. 

“Damn, that bitch really is taking too long,” Tom mumbled, leaning on the bench. “How long does it take to kill a fat man? Just stab in and ‘pop’, the deeds done.” 

“So you guys are finally killing Skeeves?” The girl spoke up, getting Tom’s attention. His eyes dilated. Marco shot him a sour look.  _ Yeah, good job asshole. We might have to kill this one now.  _

Marco looked back at the girl, though his mind vaguely remembered her from  _ somewhere _ . “...How long have you’ve lived here, if you mind me asking?” The girl gave Marco a blank look. 

“My entire life. It’s boring here.” She blew into one of her locks, getting it out of place. “Parents took my tome, so can’t try to summon…” She paused. 

“Summon demons?” Tom and Marco asked in unison. 

“Yeah, it’s not that hard. Just use a bit of blood, make a special pentagram and bam, the portal is opened.” Marco looked right at Tom, seeing the demon visibly shrink.  _...Not now.  _

“...Say we are from Hell,” Marco started. Tom slapped his forehead. “Can you make a portal back? I’m sure we can trade something that you’ll…” 

She gripped Marco’s jacket, his hood falling backward. She mouthed ‘woah’ at Marco’s flaming skull. “Shit, this is out of a comic book or something…” 

Marco pushed her back and threw up his hood, frantically looking around. “ **_Don’t do that._ ** ” He coughed, collecting himself. 

Tom spoke up, throwing an arm around her. “You seem like a fine dame. How about you teach us how to make portals and we won’t kill you, mmm?” 

She smirked, kissing Tom’s cheek. His face started burning, mumbling curses to himself. “Garlic and salt lipstick always comes in handy…” 

“I’ll burn that bitch alive!” Tom was going to strangle her but Marco grabbed his arm. Tom relented, letting Marco control the situation. 

“...How about you come back to Hell with us? I’m sure you’d like a tour or something.” Marco folded his arms, having a small smile. “What’s your name? Mine’s Marco and the Imp over there is Tom.”

“Janna.” She held out her hand, shaking Marco’s. “And man, for a skeleton, you got quite the grip.”

“Sorry that took long, you’d think sucking the life out of…” Star wiped her lips and fixed her hair, seeing Tom wincing in pain and Marco shaking Janna’s hand. “Take it we got discovered?”

“Not only that, but our  _ friend  _ lied about making portals,” Marco replied, with Tom nervously laughing. “You can castrate him later. You killed our target?” 

Star held up a simple photo on her mirror, it being of a Skeeves with blank white eyes, with his penis missing and cuts all over his body. 

Tom visibly winced at the photo, while Marco simply gave Star a proud look. “Great work honey, though did you have to rip his dick off?” 

Star giggled. “Sorry love, I kinda get excited when I ‘get at it’, you know?” Janna whistled, getting Star’s attention. “And who are  _ you  _ cutie? I like your attitude.” 

Janna smiled, folding her arms. “Janna and I take it you’re the leader of this band of idiots?” Marco and Tom raised their fingers. Star nodded, with Marco smirking and Tom cursing to himself. “Nice. Follow me, I think the cops will come soon.” 

The trio followed their new ally, narrowly avoiding police entering the parking lot.   



End file.
